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I was born on 10 May 1934 in St. Joseph, Missouri as
Fred Leonard Bellomy Jr. That makes me 65 years old as I write
this in 1999. I'll make this brief, just enough to satisfy the natural curiosity of
anyone who
has taken time to look into my work. |
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Since early childhood those adults shaping my life
repeatedly tried to convince me that I had a "good" mind, something that seemed to
contradict abundant evidence to the contrary. But then I've read
that people with an inflated
sense of their own competence usually aren't and those of us who
have doubts,
sometimes are. In any case, my nervous system does seem capable
of understanding just how little of the vast universe of
knowledge I have been able to grasp.
From the time I was
first called into the Principal's office for driving a pretty Kindergarten
classmate to tears with an unexpected kiss in the sandbox, to the time I was "expelled" for
"stealing" a bible from the chapel at the Harding Military
Academy just before my ninth birthday, every school grade found me being
transferred to a new location one or more times for discipline problems.
The pattern continued right on into high school where after two and a half
years I permanently dropped out to wander the country in search of some place where I could feel
safe and accepted.
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Annother language?
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Not until I entered junior
college in St. Joseph Missouri to play catch up, did I consider education
of much relevance. There I learned I could do just about anything I set my
mind to, and for the first time actually excelled. The hyper-motivation lasted only
through the three years I spent in two different junior colleges. When I arrived at the University of
California in Berkeley in 1955 I found academic life more difficult and the
demands on my time onerous. Working half time to support my education, I
managed rather lackluster academic achievements. Married before my senior
year and being worried about eminent draft into the Korean War with a child on
the way, I took a job with
the Navy as a civilian scientist, as much for the military deferment as
the technical challenges. |
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From the comfortable perspective of a half century later, I can see how
inept were my young, poorly educated parents' efforts to help me mature. My
mother, widowed when I was thirteen, to her credit explained "We did
the best we knew how, but we were young." I suppose we can ask no
more of our parents, and take some solace in the knowledge that whatever
our shortcomings, our care givers and others must share the blame. With better parents
any of us could have been better people. Like my parents before me, I have done
the best I could with what tools were bequeathed to me by my culture and genetic heritage. |
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What I have done with those tools is feed my
curiosity about the wonders of the Universe and my place in it. That means
I have been studying the work of highly acclaimed writers for most of my
adult life, trying to make sense of both the informed and uninformed opinions
offered by anyone who claims to have discovered the "truth" about reality and
the human condition. It is
now abundantly clear that collectively we will never know more than
a tiny fraction of the vast body of everything that might be known. Socrates
insisted that understanding the limitations of our intellect is a precursor of wisdom.
Whatever conclusions I or anyone might be able to reach must forever
remain tentative... subject to radical revision when new knowledge or insight
demands it. |
| ... what may be unknowable by anyone. |
I do finally see that knowledge and opinion are not the same
thing. Thoughtful conversations with good friends make me realize that
not everyone agrees on that point. Their "truths" often are not my "truths."
So, I'd like to record some of the things I believe to be true in a systematic
fashion, in order to better see what it is that I've learned, what I have
yet to learn, and more importantly, what may be unknowable by anyone. With any luck,
both I and my readers may discover some hidden patterns along the way.
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I
come to the task of making sense out of my experiences with an
education in physics (or natural philosophy as it was known prior to about
1900) from UC Berkeley (circa 1957) followed by many years of post graduate
university extension work in engineering / management plus the full curriculum
for a general secondary teaching credential at CSUC-Northridge,
and many more years of serious independent and classroom study
with UC Extension and various Adult Education programs, the
best of which is offered by Santa Barbara City College. I've
had a life long interest in metaphysics with what until now
has been a generally
reductionistic attitude towards explaining things I
observe: every effect has a cause firmly rooted in scientific reality and
looking closely at the parts will lead to an understanding of
the whole.
So, I must confess to a certain degree of bias when trying to untangle
the "Religion
Verses Science" philosophical controversies . Others frequently do not
share my particular beliefs in "what it all means." That's hardly a surprise
as even our most respected pundits cannot completely agree on everything.
I remain troubled by vigorously promoted opinions supported by controversial
information or unsubstantiated beliefs masquerading as infallible "god
given" knowledge, "revealed truths."
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It would appear that I may be destined to live out the rest
of my life demanding
extraordinary proof
for extraordinary claims.
Some of my friends think I am too skeptical, that I should lighten up,
open myself up more to the value of unorthodox belief systems
for which scientific examination is impossible or inappropriate. They may
be right and my current research embraces an examination of the personal
benefits of irrational beliefs: blind faith.
Next: Magnificent Illusions
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